


Gradience

by StarDusty



Series: Crystalline [3]
Category: DMMd, DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst and Fluff and Smut, DMMD AU, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M, mermaid au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-30
Updated: 2014-04-30
Packaged: 2018-01-21 09:50:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1546487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarDusty/pseuds/StarDusty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I'm sick, I'm weak, but I'm not dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gradience

Every day is the same. Wake up, swallow pills, get dressed, nap, eat, sleep. If I'm lucky, I'll have enough strength to go out with my brother, which at the moment is my only real pleasure in life. I feel like I deserve this somehow, but that doesn't change the fact that I hate it.  
I have a disease. It's not fatal, but it's not exactly fun. I was around my dad a lot when I was younger, and not only did he smoke, we also stayed in an area with a lot of air pollution, and also I'm apparently just very unlucky in that I'm prone to it. I don't remember much from my childhood save for passing out one day and waking up in a hospital to be informed that my lungs were fucked. I've had lung collapses a fair number of times, have developed emphysema, and I now have difficulty moving for extended periods of time.  
Fan-fuckin'-tastic.  
Time I have with my brother Aoba is the only real thing that keeps me happy nowadays. Nobody wants to waste time hanging out with the kid who has to be wheeled around, save for these two weird kids I knew in my old town. I contact them every now and again, and every time I see them it's harder to tell them apart. Aoba has a good friend here called Mizuki, but he's always quiet and strange around me, so we haven't really gotten too close. We're not strangers though, we text occasionally and he'll come see me every now and again when Aoba's gone.  
I sigh as softly as I could manage, coughing slightly, and pull on a shirt. I can just tell that today is gonna be one of those days when doing more than the bare minimum is gonna be a pain in the ass, so no hanging out with Aoba. Great.  
You'd get the impression that I'm rude and self-centered if you only heard what I said in my head, but I'm actually fairly polite and mild-mannered. I'm just sick of this body. I want to be free and do what everyone else does for once.  
I sit myself down in my wheelchair, not willing to risk falling, because when you're me that's not a good thing. I pass a mirror in the hallway on my way to speak with Aoba, and I look at myself. Thin. Pale. My eyes are dark but warm, and the contrast between them and my almost white skin has always stood out to me, especially compared to my brother, with his electric blue hair and skin tanned from going out almost every day.  
I envy him. I really do.   
He's so precious to me, the only one who's always been by my side. He never complains about having to take me around or check on me. If I'm having a problem with anything, and not even just because of my disease, if I was just having a bad day, he has and will always be there for me. He's my dumb, spontaneous, outgoing little brother and I love him. Time to wake him the fuck up.  
I gently knock on the heavy oak door, before lightly pushing it open. It creaked audibly as at swung slowly open.  
"Good morning, Aoba." I smile, softly. I hear an inhuman grunt from beneath a mass of cyan hair, and I roll myself towards him. His hazel eyes squint at me, as if he'd been in the dark for the past 5 years and was learning to adjust again. He may be my younger brother who I care for dearly but if I am going to get him to move I am going to have to use force, so I sing his name and flop onto his back.  
He makes a noise reminiscent of a cat being stood on and glares in my general direction. I let a giggle slip out before I put my hand over my mouth, and he smiles as he emerges from his blanket. However, his smile soon enough turns to a sigh, and it doesn't take a genius to figure out what he's thinking. We know eachother. We can read eachother. And I know he's upset because of me. I reach towards his head, gently petting him. I want him to know that everything is okay, I'm okay, I'll get better. I don't know if it will. But I can pretend, for the center of my life, my world, my universe needs to be assured.  
I locked everybody out of my heart after the first few close friends I have began to walk away. They'd play with my toys, the expensive gifts my parents would buy me. Those gifts that apologised for giving me such a fucked up body, such a fucked up life, we're sorry you were born, son, but we'll just buy your affections until you finally fall down and die.  
I'm bitter. I have every right to be. They never even spent time with me after the first hospital trip, they just left me to myself, until the doctors recommended I moved to the ocean, and whilst my parents couldn't come because of "work commitments" aka they were too busy doing whatever they felt like to care, my grandmother took Aoba and I to the coast, and I've never looked back.  
Aoba tells me he's leaving today, asking if I wish to join him, but when my body feels like this I know better. I don't want to stress him ,so I tell him I'm taking a nap. He smiles, ruffles my hair, and gets ready to leave as I go back to my own room at the other end of the hall. I close my door, put my head in my hands, pushing them through my hair, messying the ponytail I had so neatly tied earlier. I hit my hand against the wall with as much energy as I could afford to expend, taking a deep breath and going over to my bed. I grab my phone, scrolling through my contacts automatically. I don't have many, so it doesn't take long to get to who I'm looking for.  
"H... I... J... K... Aaaand... M!" I mutter to myself. I may as well find some way to pass the time, so I'll just message Mizuki.  
seiitaintso: mizuuukiii  
Mizuki: Sei, is that you? Of course it is, nobody else would use such terrible puns to refer to themself.  
seiitaintso: shut up im hilarious  
seiitaintso: im boooored aobas left me all alone  
seiitaintso: entertain me  
Mizuki: Are you asking me to come over?  
seiitaintso: sure   
Mizuki: Alright. I'll be there in 10.  
I lock my phone and lay my head back. At least I'm not gonng be bored out of my mind for the day, I guess. Mizuki's alright, even if he is a little odd around me. Better than being alone, or even just with Ren.  
I listen to music, letting my eyes flutter shut as I wait for him. He won't be long, but I like to relax. I'm almost starting to doze off when I hear the sound of the door being opened, followed by a gentle thud and various clattering noises. I hear Mizuki exchanging greetings with Granny, before I hear a soft, rhythmic tap on my door.  
"Come in." I whisper, lazily opening my eyes. The door opens, carrying the scent of freshly-baked sweets and chocolate cream. Mizuki was the son of the local baker, so it made sense that he picked up a few things from his parents. He sets down a box on the beige bedside table, and sits on an oversized cushion. He briefly makes eye contact, but quickly looks away. I might be imagining things, but his skin appears to be lightly flushed with a rosy hue. Maybe it's too hot in here? Is he sick? Whatever, I'm sure he's fine. If he has a problem I'm sure he'll tell me. He pulls the box open.   
"Chocolate topped pastries filled with... Let me guess... Vanilla cream?" He knows that I like vanilla filled pastries, so it seems obvious to me that he'd bring something like that.  
"Y-yeah!" He stutters. He grabs one, tears off a large chunk and pushes it in his mouth. I put my index finger on his nose.  
"Were you raised in a barn, Kiki?" He puffs up his cheeks at the nickname. I don't think he really hates it, but it's fun to play around with him. He swallows nonchalantly, taking another bite  
"Aren't you gonna eat?" He asks, dodging my question completely.   
"Feed me~" I sing, opening my mouth teasingly. He almost chokes, skin flushing darker.  
"Hey, hey, I'm only joking! Be careful!" I laugh, stifling my cough. It wouldn't do to show him that I'm anything less that perfectly healthy, although he knows about my condition. I bite into one of the fluffy pastries. Delicate flakes flutter off as I move my mouth. I accidentally bit into the center. Shit. Vanilla fondant oozes out onto my face before I can stop it, running down my chin and falling to my hand, on my fingers, to be precise.   
"Seiwhatareyoudoingyou'remakingamessand-" In an attempt to stop Mizuki, king motormouth, I push my cream covered fingers into his mouth. Other than the creamy substance, they're clean. Probably.  
"Sh." I motion with a finger on my free hand. He appears to have transcended to a whole new level of scarlet.  
"No homo though~" I wink at him. He stares, seemingly unable to formulate words any more. I allow myself a laugh, and for the first time in what felt like forever it wasn't followed with a cough.  
After he finally recovered from my homosexual tendancies, we chatted about anything and everything. I fidgeted around in my bed, beginning to feel far too warm to be comfortable. Fuck, I hope I haven't caught something. That could be bad. I spontaneously throw off my shirt, throwing my arms around Mizuki. I am having far too much fun teasing him.  
"Kikiiii, it's hoooot-." Of course, he's warmer than I am, but that's to be expected at this point.  
"Sei, put your shirt on." He attempts to be stern but his voice cracks.  
"It's soooo hot though, what if I do that and I die? Then who will eat all the delicious vanilla fondant?" I pout at him with an expression half-mocking and half-insulted. I slide myself into his lap, letting my knee gently push between his legs. I want to see what he'll do next. Unfortanately for me, I was near immediately thrown off. Softly. I don't know if you can throw someone off softly, but he manages. Out of habit, I close my hand into a fist when I land, forgetting I still had half a pastry in my palm, and the cream slides onto my chest. Fantastic, this unofficial game of gay chicken is getting interesting.  
"Kikiii, look what you did~ I'm all dirty!.. Really though, I ought to take a bath, but I'd struggle without Aoba... Will you bathe me?" I shoot him my best angelic look. He can't meet my eye and turns away from me immediately, rubbing his thighs together slightly. Did I hurt him when I sat on him? Whoops. But, all's fair in love and gay chicken.  
"Haha it's been really fun but I gotta get going Sei okay okay goodbye!!" And the door closes.  
I win.


End file.
